Last Night

Last night I get a call just before 10 pm...a beloved and active member of our parish had had a heart attack and was gone. Just like that a life that was, was no more, and a family immediately began to shift its priorities.

Now we all know that when it comes time for us to cease bodily functions, we would all like to go in such a manner. We want to be active, alert, and attentive up until the last moment. We don't want to linger and struggle. This is all well and good for us who wish we could plan our demise, but what about those left behind?

To be honest, as I sat with this family, even in the midst of their shock I saw the firm foundation of faith supporting them through this ordeal. Yes, there were tears and even regrets, but there was a firm conviction that the beloved was in a better place, and they faced their trial with a sense that God was still at work turning tragedy into triumph.

It makes me reflect, however, how easily we imagine that there will be a tomorrow. Obviously we cannot live in fear of dying, for then we would never live. Yet, whether it be physic numbing or simply ignorance, we rarely imagine that such a tragedy could happen to us. And still it does with frequent regularity. Can we ever be prepared? Probably not. Can we understand? Regretfully, not well. Can we live in the face of death? There is one who promises us the hope of life on the other side of death.

I'm not sure where I wish to go with this entry, except to say that the title, 'Last Night' is intended to have us all think. What if we knew this was our last day/night? How would we change the way we live our lives? Perhaps this is a good thought to ponder...

Peace,
Pal

Haiti Isn't Gone

Well, the Olympics have captivated our attention, and well they should as we witness the tremendous abilities of the athletes in the snow of Vancouver.

Then there is the continuing debate over health care in the USA. I stil don't understand why a minority of 41 is able to keep us from really trying to do something to fix a system that is not working... but I suppose that is for those far more intelligent than I.

But what about Haiti? Haven't heard too much lately right? Does that mean the problem is over? Nah! The truth is that the worst is yet to come unless we continue to attend to this country on life support.

The news cycle reminds me of what happens when someone dies. For a few days friends and neighbors stop and attend to the needs of the ones who are left behind. Then life gets the better of us, and we move on, leaving those who are hurting the most to hurt in silence when they most need support.

Haiti continues to need our support. The people are facing the rainy season without much shelter. As the media shifts its attention, you know that the governments will soon do the same without pressure from people like us. So let the people in Washington know that you still care about what is happening in Haiti. Let's not let this one just slip off the radar screen.

As for one thing you can do... the Resurrection Dance Theater from St Joseph's Home for Boys in Haiti will be in Phoenix March 9-12. They will be in the East Valley Tuesday night, at Peace Lutheran on Wednesday, and in Sun City on Thursday. Come on out and support these boys as they tell their story and their hope.

Social Networking

Social Networking is all the rage. Do you tweet? Are you on Facebook? Will you answer my friend request? Well, after having joined this great movement I have come to some conclusions...

First, like most any form of networking, you have to listen to a lot of drivel before there is any depth. In the upper midwest they may talk about a snow storm coming in. In Phoenix, we may talk about how hot it is today. At the family table we may hear a lot about nothing. On Facebookl, we get to hear about Farmville and Mafia Wars. Yet, like in all our other settings, some of this is just the precursor to that moment when the conversation goes deep.

Second, it is interesting when you are limited in the characters or words you are allowed to type. We are developing a 'personal ads' form of conversation. The nice thing is that when most of what you read is somewhat inane it is nice to know there is a limit. The sad side of it is when you do have that moemnt when real life is being shared.

Third, the social networking sites can be a great means to connect people from a wide geographical area for the purpose or cause that is their passion. This past week, I have tried an experiment to see if through my very small network, I could use the 100 people to pass on a message of support for my Leukemia ride. It was gratifying seeing some of my 'friends' pass on my message to their social groups. At this time, however, while some have responded, it has not been a great way to get the message out. We will see if that changes with a little bit more time.

Finally, social networking reveals just how narcissitic we can be. It is one thing to hear Uncle Joe talk at Christmas dinner about his ingrown toenail, but it is completely different to hear about the ups and downs of various 'friends.' I'm not sure I would want people to know all the inner workings of my life, but for others it is just part of the territiory. I suppose I am grateful for their honesty and vulnerability, but nonetheless I wonder if there are not more important issues for us to be engaged in in cyberspace.

Just a few random thoughts.

Peace,
pal

Has the World Gone Crazy

Last week I went with my wife to the theater. We went to eat at a pizza place downtown. As we walk in, there is a sign 'No Guns.' Has the world gone crazy?

In Arizona we are so upside down on the budget that it isn't funny. What does our Republican legislature do? The Governor (Republican) recommends letting the people decide if they want a temporary sales tax. The legislaure holds it breath, stomps its feet, and says, 'NO!'

While the budget spins further out of line, the legislature takes on legislation like the removal of speed cameras on our freeways. Even though they save lives (proven), add to revenue, and all you have to do is stay within 11 miles of the speed limit (huh?), it appears that our legislatures believe this to be an infringement on our freedom. Oh yeah, this is the state that doesn't require motorcycle riders to wear a helmet. This is the state that allows you to take a gun into a bar. That's right we wouldn't want to infringe on the freedom to get drunk while carrying a weapon.

At the same time we have these Tea Party folks who are now raising a ruckus because John McCain is too liberal. Huh? John McCain is no where near the maverick he once projected himself to be. This is the man who has swung so far right that he has Jeff Sessions looking like a liberal. Yet he is far too liberal for the Tea Party folks. Yes indeed, let's not have any taxes, and let's get Sheriff Joe into an office where he can do some real good. The world has gone crazy. How did I get here?

A NEW YEAR

It's been a long time since posting. I feel as if I have earned a 'cone of shame'for being such a bad dog.

Interestingly, we are often caught in the vise of shame. We have not lived up to the expectations of others, let alone ourselves, and are left with the reminder of all the other times we failed. Some of us are so caught up in this never-ending downward cycle that we feel like giving up. What's the use?

Isn't this the engine behind the very profitable diet industry in America? People try to lose weight, but get behind only to find themselves worse off than before, and give up thinking of themselves as failures. Each time they try they discover they are worse off than they were before.

All too often, I see this in the church as well. Someone makes a goal to read the Bible from front to back, and once they get stuck in Leviticus, they give up. Others commit to give a certain amount of money and then a crisis intervenes and they feel like they're a failure. Is this the message the church wants to encourage?

I guess everything would be okay if we just thought differntly about ourselves. If only we all could practice positive self-eteem. Yes, there are as many motivators of the mind out there as those who shill for diet developers. Yes we know the results are about the same for each. I'm not much better at thinking positively about myself than I am imagining myself skinnier than I am.

So what are we to do? Well a lot of churches offer the mind motivator 'stuff' with a little bit of Jesus and call it a miracle method. Obviously, I don't go for that! I believe that thinking positive results when we experinece what Jesus came to offer us.

First of all, how about real community. A community that is like family (including dysfunctionalities) built around the promise of grace. We hunger for a family that knows that none of us measures up and we can nonetheless live with one another.

Second, how about real service. More than just an 'tip' in the plate, but offering ourselves in service of others in need. Nothing makes us feel better about ourselves than knowing we were of assistance to another in their need. We were created to give it all away.

Third, let's consider worship. As one T-Shirt said, 'The difference between God and me is that he doesn't think he's me.' Worship that isn't about getting a spiritual high, but worship that is an offering of myself and a willingness to live with imperfection. Let's get back to making worship center around God and not my needs.

Fourth, reading the written Word is not to be an exercise so that I can prove myself more knowledgable or worthy than you. Hopefully, by getting into Scripture we will experience God's grace revealed to undeserving people and realize that we are those people. Such a way of reading just may make us more compassionate and caring for those who don't agree with us.

I don't like wearing the 'cone of shame,' yet I realize that it is me not God who attaches this around my collar. Perhaps as I experience the marks of faithful living, I will be less controled by the cone of shame, and more free to see the world without blinders. As we begin 2010, wouldn't it be great if we could trust that God does truly love us without condition. Something I need to think about.

Grace

Grace... it is a word that we use so freely and frequently within the community of Christ. We can define it, like with the acrostic;
God's
Righteousness
At
Christ's
Expense.
Or we can simply speak of unconditional love (whatever that truly is).
Yet we who are finite, how is it that we can begin to understand yet apply such an infinite concept?

Over the past few days I have had to struggle with this concept. Of course as a Lutheran, what runs in my mind is the tyranny of legalism, and the temptation of "cheap grace" as per the words of D. Bonhoeffer. I am shocked to think that maybe I choose the law over God's grace, and yet I am alarmed that the easy out of forgiveness without repentance would make for what Luther would call a religion that is worth nothing.

At the center of my diliberation is how to exercise my pastoral office. I realize that there is no right choice, and that in the end no matter what I choose, there will be pain, sadness, and disappointment. There is no easy grace for me in my decision.

As I wrestled with a response, I was reminded by another of the story of the prodigal son (Luke chapter 15). In that case, however, the son was repentant... the son was willing to come back under the authority of his father... the son was willing to submit. While Grace was offered by the father, and it was offered before the son even had a chance to say a word, nonetheless this was born out of the desire of both parties to be in a loving relationship with each other.

Grace becomes cheap if it offers the "prize" without reform of one's direction in life. Grace is not grace if it allows us to continue in our harmful patterns without challenging the validity of a path of individual identity apart from our subservience to God's will. Grace may be unconditional, but if it does not bring a change in the condition of those to whom it is offered, then one must wonder what was the point?

I know for myself that if measured I fail, and fail often. I am far from perfect as a pastor, husband, father, and instrument of God's grace. Somehow, however, this seems to be the first step into the midst of God's grace. For as long as I am unwilling to admit of my sin/brokeness/ rebellion, I may desire grace, but I really don't cling to grace. I simply am using grace as a means of salving my conscious as I continue in the way I would choose for myself.

In the end, I have chosen not to offer a panacea that would ease the pain of the moment, but not address the disease. I have chosen rightly or wrongly to opt for the costly grace of the cross... a grace that leads us into death so that we might experience life as God intended. I have chosen not to allow what others may want or believe they are entitled to because we are suppose to show grace, because I believe that grace calls us to hold up the mirror before ourselves, and confess how sin twists God's good intentions. I can never be sure I have chosen correctly, but in all humility I pause and trust in God's grace for me, a sinner of God's redeeming.

Anything to Say?

My wife tells me frequently that I should write a book. My response is, "What?"

I'm not the type that can imagine typing away at an opus masterpiece. Yet I'm reminded that all great journeys begin with but one small step. So perhaps this little blog is my first step toward something more profound. Or maybe its just meanderings of a middle aged pastor. Do I have anything to say?

Speaking of the profound, I am always amazed at how lacking in profundity we are. We settle too easily for sound bites and simple answers rather than doing the hard work of learning through listening.

I have had a variety of people tell me what the Bible says about one thing or another. When I asked them how they came to their conclusion, all too frequently they will quote to me one bible verse, or some vague generalities that they hope will mask their lacking of understanding. When did we as followers of Christ decide that "written word" takes precedence over the incarnate word Christ? Wasn't Jesus always confronting their understanding of the written word?

It's like me sitting down to this computer and pounding out a few words and claiming some special knowledge that is beyond what others might say. This is plain crazy, and yet time and time again, I have people who have only the rudimentary biblical skills telling me what the bible truly says. Now, please don't get me wrong, I believe that one doesn't have to go to college in order to get an education. Nor do I believe one needs to attend seminary to understand or discern the meaning of scriptures, but it sure does help to some extent. If we don't have a very strong understanding, doesn't it make sense to study under one who might have greater knowledge or expertise? Yet, all too often our piety or pride gets in the way of such a sensible choice.

Like I say in the title, I really don't have much to say... especially if I want to keep up the appearances of being fairly intelligent. So I will end with a joke,,, it's better to keep your mouth shut and have people assume you to be stupid than open it and prove people right.

Peace.